


Red cosmos

by Eboliziona



Series: Hanahaki desease [1]
Category: No Straight Roads (Video Game)
Genre: DJ also uses they/him pronouns, DJ lowkey cares but would rather be sent into space by Zuke and May again than admit it, F/M, Gen, Gender-Neutral Pronouns, Hanahaki Disease, I also gave Yinu's mother a name, I can't tag to save my life, I think it's canon ?, I've only posted one other fic here and it was about an android, M/M, Mention of blood, Neon J loves his sons, Neon is Korean because I said so, Reader's gender is not specified, also tried to refere to 1010 with gender-neutral pronouns as much as possible, and a trans man, and now it's a cyborg, because it felt weird to just refer her as "mama", but he is also a stubborn idiot, look at me making this poor man suffer, please love him, story is told from Neon's POV because it was much easier for me
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-28
Updated: 2020-10-28
Packaged: 2021-03-08 19:48:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,720
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27242197
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Eboliziona/pseuds/Eboliziona
Summary: You deserve better than a broken soldier haunted by his past. You deserve better so he suffers in silence as his end approaches and you remain unaware of his pain. It's better this way.
Relationships: Neon J. (No Straight Roads)/Reader
Series: Hanahaki desease [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1989049
Comments: 13
Kudos: 75





	Red cosmos

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you "nsr-scrapped-records" for your helpful advice and "kumogomi" for your beautiful Eloni fanart on Tumblr, you gave me the inspiration to write again ! Please go check them out.  
> https://nsr-scrapped-records.tumblr.com/  
> https://kumogomi.tumblr.com/

He recognizes the first signs almost right away. First the rising overheating warnings obscuring his screen even when the scans detect no anomaly in his system. So, he simply brushed them off because he does not have time to waste, he must keep making content for his ~~sons~~ troops. Everyone is counting on him, his soldiers, NSR, Vinyl City and he _can’t_ fail them.

Then came this oppressive pain in this chest that would last for a few seconds at first but quickly evolved into minutes, then hours and finally days. It was unlike anything he had felt before. This was different from when he had felt his limps being torn apart during the war. This was different from the phantom pains he still felt after waking up from another memory of his subordinates dying around him, screaming for help that would never come. This was different from when Bunk Bed Junction shattered his face and broke his mechanical legs, paralyzing him for several hours. This pain is different because he never expected to feel it.

It’s becoming harder to breath without breaking into an unstoppable fit of coughs as time goes on, he starts to dread the monthly NSR meetings. He is terrified at the idea of breaking in front of everyone, in front of _you_. He cannot have everyone worry over him -he doesn’t deserve it- they already have so much to deal with since that chaotic revolution, he doesn’t want to be a disappointment -not again- _hecan’thecan’thecan’thecan’t !_

He stops leaving Barraca Mansion as soon as he spots the first petal falling from his cape and sends Rin in his stead, insisting the boy has enough experience to replace him so that he can now solely focuses himself on creating music and dance moves for the troops. Nobody objects, though he can tell Tatiana is suspicious of his motives. The boys say nothing, but he doesn’t miss the look of worry they exchange between each other before leaving to their respective quarters. He loathes lying to them, he had promised himself to never do it again. But what other choice did he have ?

_Cowardcowardcowardcoward-nothing but a miserable coward-_

_**“You are my second in command soldier, so I expect you to be on your best behaviour !”** _

**_“Yes Captain !”_ **

He prays, prays to a god he doesn’t believe in anymore that he is the first one to notice the scarlet petals escaping his body through his fans. He prays, that _you_ of all people remains ignorant of his pain. Because none of it is your fault. If only-

****

**_“Sir ? Is everything alright ? It’s been days since you left your room.”_ **

**_“Affirmative soldier. I am currently undergoing several imperative upgrades. You will receive your next moves in approximatively three days. You are dismissed.”_ **

**_“ But d- alright sir.”_ **

Hearing Haym so concerned about his well-being and being forced to send him away only serves to further increase his guilt. Out of all his brothers, he had always been the most sensitive when it came to other people’s suffering and anguish. Neon knows it’s only a matter of time before the five of them decide to force his door open, they’ve done it before. And so he drowns in his own mind, desperately trying to find something, anything that could hide his condition.

All of his attempts to ease his pain in the last few weeks have been met with failure. He tries to shut off his pain sensors but it’s useless for he can’t shut off the deep-rooted pain in his lungs. He even thinks of cutting the roots that threaten to crush his remaining organs but it quickly proves to be futile, they come back in a matter of hours and the more he tries to cut them out, the tighter they grow back, tangling with the wires and veins he still have left. He feels like throwing up and the inability to do so is starting to drive him insane, the acidic bile mixed with the petals and blood in what remains of his trachea make him feel like he is burning. He has to stop himself more than once from tearing apart the wires hooked in his heart.

He is sinking in a sea of red, a colour that always seemed to follow him everywhere he went. He sees red in the warnings that still flash on his screen, sometimes to the point of being unable to decipher his surroundings . He sees red in the memories of his younger self begging his mother to stop slapping him after he told her he didn’t want to be a girl anymore. He sees red from the first wound he receives during the war; the pain momentarily dizzying his senses and remembers the sense of bitterness that had followed soon after. He had warned them the enemy’s retreat was a trap, that they should wait for more reinforcements and they had ignored him. He sees red in the flowers that surround him and he hates that they remind him of his homeland. How long has it been since his last Cosmos Flower Festival ?

****

**_“_** **하** **…** **나는** **내** **마음을** **잃고있어** **…”**

****

You deserve better than this. You deserve better than a red cosmos flower, he knows what they mean but he still wishes fate had cursed him with a flower that did not remind him of all his ordeals, but he supposes he deserve it. Even in love, he has to be reminded of his worthlessness. You deserve better. You deserve better than a broken soldier hunted by visions of the war whose only way to cope with his past relies on replicating it through androids -each carrying a part of him- who feed on the praise the crowd give them. How utterly pathetic. J really can’t blame you for trying to avoid him for the past few months.

**_“Still, I wish I could have hold you in my arms at least once…”_ **

But who hold someone-no something- as cold as him ? Something that is barely human anymore.

The next time he goes out is only because Rin was careless enough to jump into the pool just because Zimelu dared him to, causing him to blackout for the whole day. Why did they even have a pool in the first place ? Just because they had mild water resistance didn’t mean they could just- Ha well, they’ve been growing restless ever since he told them the reason he left home so rarely was because he had been victim of several hacking attacks in his system for the past six months (which was technically not a lie). Even Purlhew, who usually looked so composed seemed more agitated than usual. And poor Eloni who already suffered from being the least popular among them constantly came to check on him when it was not Haym. Really, would he keep worrying everyone until he was dead ?

The meeting goes smoothly for the most part, he manages to only coughs up once or twice and is even able to suggest several ideas to the group despite the immense suffering he is under. Even in his state however, he is still able to feel Tatiana’s gaze never fully leaving him and it frightens him. She has always been a very observant and sharp woman and even if she had softened up since her battle with Zuke and Mayday, she still remained acute in her judgement. Another thing that also bothers him is when he notices the seat next to her is empty. Usually, you would sit right next to the ex Googling leader, ready to take notes whenever something important was spoken or decided. And when he understands he will not be able to see you today, it feels as if the vines around his lungs abruptly tighten their grip. It takes everything in him to fight back the sob that threatens to leave his body. 

The meeting ends and he is about to excuse himself before his employer can question him but then two sets of actions stops him dead in his tracks. First, Supernova goes to Tatiana and asks her why you aren’t here and if you’re unwell in a voice that is much too quiet for someone who loves to bring attention on themselves. They almost sound…concerned ? Neon can see Tatiana shares his confusion and surprise because it takes her a few seconds to compose herself before answering.

**_“They sent me an email yesterday telling me they wouldn’t be able to come to work in the next few days for personal reasons.”_ **

_Personal reasons ?_ What does she mean with that ? Did something happen to you ? Are you sick ? Are you in pain ? Is she hiding the real reason ? Why is Supernova-

**Warning: Heartrate is reaching critical levels**

**Warning: Electrical components reaching critical heat levels.**

**Warning: Critical malfunction detected in air ventilation canals** _._

He needs to leave; he needs to get away from here before he crumbles on the floor, why is there so much noise around him ? Why is his screen so blurry ? Why-

A soft voice calls out to him before he can register the hand on his shoulder guiding him away from the room and everything stops. When he finally snaps back to reality he notices he is standing in the elevator which is going down. The voice calls out his name another time and this time he recognizes who it belongs to and turns around to see a genuinely concerned Yinu next to her mother who looks equally worried.

_It happened again_

Maia is about to say something to him but she suddenly stops herself and instead reaches for his cape, he freezes when he sees the red petals in her hands. When she looks at him again, she looks horrified and in a quiet but non-negotiable tone tells him to follow her home. He doesn’t even have the energy to refuse. He knows she only wishes to help him.

He tells her everything. When he started to love you, when you started to avoid him, when the pain started and when the petals first appeared, he tells her everything except your name. He can not bring himself to say it because it would be unfair for you. She only asks for it once and does not pressure him when he refuses, though he can tell it saddens her.

**_“I wish I could help you; you’ve been so kind and helpful to Yinu and I but there is nothing I can do. Considering the state you’re in I don’t think you will last more than a few weeks… “_ **

Part of him feels relieved for sharing his ordeal but another one feels like he only burdened her. But he is also glad to know it will be over soon, he won’t have to bother anymore people. Maia does not even suggest the surgery, she knows how much he values being a cyborg, she remembers the first time he corrected- in a firm but patient tone- Yinu when her little girl had called him a robot.

He can’t bring himself destroy what is left of his humanity.

**_“Do the boys know ? Rin looked rather calm when I saw him last time.”_ **

**_“They are not aware of my condition and I intend to keep it that way. A copy of myself will activate itself a few days before my departure, I built it a few months after the boys were operational, should something happen to me. I must admit- I did not except to use it in such conditions but a soldier must always be ready to face the unknown. The copy will know- what to do with me.”_ **

She promises him with tears in her eyes to never tell anyone, save for Tatiana but only after he is gone and maybe when she is old enough, to Yinu as well. He hates seeing her like this but he knows she is faithful to her word, she will respect his wish.

**_“I still think you should tell them…there is a chance they might feel the same. But I know you are a stubborn idiot Neon, I know you hate to burden people and how much you overworked yourself in the years I’ve known you. I also you know you are a good man even if you don’t believe it.”_ **

For the first time in his life, he wishes he still had the ability to cry.

He finds himself lucky, his troops are repeating for their next song- one he won’t be able to hear he wistfully realizes- when he comes back home. He barely manages to reach his room before collapsing on his connected chair. By the time he reaches it he is all but wheezing for breath and understands the petals have finally blocked his circuits. It takes him long agonizing minutes before he can access the only part of him that is not made of metal. He removes the plate that covers his chest with great difficulty before throwing it on the ground. Thousands of petals escape from his chest like butterflies leaving their chrysalis and he thinks it’s one of the most beautiful scenery he’s ever seen in his life. The sea of red appears again before his eyes but this time he gazes at it peacefully.

Three days later he is forced to lie all day, he no longer has enough strength to create content for ~~his~~ the boys. Maia asks if Yinu can stay at his place for the day -she has business to discuss with Supernova for a collaboration- and of course he agrees, like always. She apologizes for asking him, like always, but this time the words are spoken with far more sadness than usual and in whisper-like voice asks him if he still hasn’t thought of confessing. His silence is enough of answer.

_Cowardcowardcowardcoward_

None of his soldiers come to check on him, they are all too busy trying to make sure the girl doesn’t drown in the pool or break a bone trying to reach the cookie jar that was bought exclusively for her. Though he already knows what kind of drawings he will find on their faces once she leaves. The thought amuses him for a moment, for once he is glad the kid needs five pairs of eyes to keep her entertained and alive. Unfortunately, he has no more hand-made toys to gift her.

Spending the whole day lying without being unable to do anything and without any distribution – saves for Zimelu screaming bloody murder because Eloni once again disconnected his joystick from the console - is the worst thing that could happen to him, he’s not used being so static. And so of course he starts to think about you, about when he realized how important you were to him. Was it because he was so desperate for affection ? Desperate to be cradled by protective arms ? Is he really a starved man, hopelessly seeking for any sign of affection ?

You would always listen to him even when he started ranting about himself and the war he fought in. He remembers the first time you asked him for more details, as if fascinated by what he had to share, it had taken him a few moments to register your request, your attention fully focused on him. It was not his role to be the centre of attention. But you kept on listening and asking questions each time you saw , even when you had trouble understanding him. Once, after an even more stressful day that usual, you had come to him, sat on the seat next to his and waited, until he was ready to share his stories again. A simple action, which again, meant so much to him.

**_“ Soldier ! Have I ever told you about the time our ship managed to repel an enemy that had completely encircled us with forces that outnumbered us three to one during the winter of xx67 ?”_ **

**_“I don’t think so sir, tell me what happened.”_ **

You never judged him for his past actions even when some of them were clearly _questionable_. You seemed to understand, for some reason, that it had never been a fight he wished to enlist in even before he told you. It had caused him to wonder, how easily could you see through him ? And why did you start to seek his company in the first place ? What were your true motives ? All questions that would start to distract him more and more as time went on. So he did something he now deeply regrets. He investigated on you, your life, your hobbies, your family, your work experiences, nothing went past his radar. And he found nothing. The paranoid and apprehensive soldier in him believed it was all fake and that you had to hide something while the more trustful and hopeful toymaker wished to trust you. In the end, it was the latter one who won his inner conflict .

One late evening, after another successful performance from his troops celebrated at the NSR Tower, you had once again managed to find him, this time on the balcony. It was as if you were the one equipped with an internal GPS, with the sole purpose of finding him amongst any crowd. He entertained the idea if only for a second. Your tired had expression morphed into a relaxed smile upon noticing him leaning against the cold handrail. He recalls his heart had missed a few beats upon watching you. He composed himself and asked if you would like to take a walk in a quieter place. You followed without question.

This evening he confessed everything to you. He confessed about why he had been forced to leave a job he loved so much to fight a war he did not even understand nor believed in. He confessed about how much this war changed and scarred him to the point he could not even recognize himself when he looked in a mirror. He confessed about what happened the night his division fell into a trap that could have easily been avoided. He confessed about how the only reason he survived was because the reinforcements had found him hidden under a pile of his fallen subordinates, barely breathing and dying but brought back to life because some scientist thought it was the perfect opportunity to test their little experience. He confessed about all the agony he was under for the following months and never really left him. He confessed about the nightmares and visons that still plague him and how he always wakes up feeling guilty for surviving. He confessed about what his soldiers represent and mean to him. He confessed about what NSR means to him and how much he sacrificed for them as well. He confessed about his doubts of not being human anymore. All his anguish and scars, he confessed to you.

You had stayed quiet during his whole confession and your expressions had morphed from casual to horror to disgust, to pure rage, but not at him. Your rage was not directed at his actions but rather those who had caused them. It felt so good, to be able to share all his pain to someone who did not judge. Your next words however, completely stunned him.

**_“You always spoke of those days with such pride…I-didn’t even think of asking what those battles did to you…You don’t deserve any of this…I’m sorry, Neo-sir.”_ **

You looked so ashamed of yourself, eyes downcast and avoiding his screen, half biting your lips. He really didn’t like that look on you but didn’t know what to say to console you. It had been so long since he had to comfort someone. 

**_“I hate what they did to you.”_ **

You had left after that and like a fool he had let you go without saying anything, too busy to recover from what your words did to him. He should have said something, that you didn’t have to apologize, that talking to you brought him a sense of peace he hadn’t felt in a long time, that you couldn’t have known. Anything to have you smile at him even just for a little longer. But again he acted like a coward.

Everything went downhill after that night. Your weekly-sometimes daily- encounters became rarer and eventually stopped altogether and after the revolution he barely managed to catch a glimpse of you. He had been mortified when he’d learnt the satellite was aimed at the Tower but had trusted Tatiana to evacuate you and the rest of the staff to safety. The only times he could really see you were during the monthly meetings, yet your eyes would look at anywhere but him as if you were afraid to even glance in his direction. Your expression looked sharper, more distant and colder, like a robot. Was it because of him ? Or had you finally grown tired of him after hearing his story ?

It doesn’t matter now, he’s dying and you’ll get better eventually.

**_“They sent me an email yesterday telling me they wouldn’t be able to come to work in the next few days for personal reasons.”_ **

But then he recalls Supernova and Tatiana’s discussion about you and it puzzles him. The egoistical DJ had never shown any act of sympathy or even acknowledgement towards you so why ? Why did they inquire about your state out of the blue ? Were they aware of a condition of yours that nobody else knew of ? One he hadn’t found out when doing his digging about you ? They wouldn’t have asked if it was just a mild-cold, would they ? Are you safe ? Why did he not think to check on you before ?!

**Warning: multiples malfunctions detected in respiratory system**

**Warning: multiple corruptions detected in battery slots**

He can’t bear to hear that voice anymore !

**_“Silence ! Silence- urgh !”_ **

**Warning: Multi-**

**_“Quiet ! Mute all warning protocols !”_ **

It’s quiet again, but he can’t stop the small red screens which keep appearing before him. He can feel it, his mechanical body desperately fighting to keep him alive. He can feel the vines around his lungs tightening their hold. He can feel everything, and it hurts. He’s so tired, if only he could just rest a bit. But he needs to know if you’re alright, he needs to know, he needs to-

**_“Captain ? Are you all right ?”_ **

_No, I’m not alright._

**_“Sir ?”_ **

_Leave…_

**_“ J please open the door ! Answer us !”_ **

_I can’t. I can’t let you boys see me like this…_

**_“ I can’t open the door ! Sir tell us why !”_ **

_He needs to know why he couldn’t see you…_

**_“ J if you don’t answer the door right now, we will come in ourselves, by any means necessary.”_ **

_No. No. No !_ _Nononononononono- the copy is still not deployed !_

He can’t speak. He can’t stop them and before he can think of an alternative Neon hears the sound of metallic bodies throwing themselves against his equally metallic door. They’re going to damage themselves !

 _젠장_ _!_

By the time the door is starting to give up under the pressure, Neon only manages to get up from his bed, barely able to stand, with the help of his chair. He tries to speak again but his voice modulator refuses to work. He wants to scream, to cry, to yell. What sort of soldier refuses to obey their commander ?

**_“Again ! We’re almost there !”_ **

_안_ _돼_ _! Why are they so stubborn !_

Right after he manages to turn to face the opposite wall, the door finally gives, in a deafening crash quickly followed by four heavy bodies falling flat on the floor and one stopping at the entry. It’s Purlhew, of course, they are the first to see him leaning on the chair for support, the first to glance around and notice all the petals covering the usually cleaned room, the first one to hear the glitches-like sounds in his breathing. Neon can’t see their face, but he doesn’t need to, he already knows what the blue themed android looks like under those shades.

**_“J…are you sick ?”_ **

Their words are spoken with hesitancy and caution as the others get up to assess the situation and after a synchronised gasp, they all start to approach him slowly. He can’t keep it up anymore. He can feel his mind starting to fade. He’s going to-

**_“Dad !”_ **

****

**System rebooting: initializing emergency protocol**

_What ? Where am I ?_

**Warning: system severely damaged from internal malfunctions**

_What is happening-oh_

**_“Why didn’t he say anything ?”_ **

_I’m sorry._

**_“We could have helped during all this time…”_ **

_I’m sorry…_

**_“How could he lie to us about something like this ?”_ **

_I’m so sorry…_

**_“I can’t believe it…what can we do ?”_ **

_Nothing can be done soldier…_

**_“Do you think the others know about it ?”_ **

_No…don’t drag them into it…_

Why is still alive ? He shouldn’t be alive. Why couldn’t his troops obey his orders ? Why did they feel the need to save him ? Why ? Wait, what was that last word he heard before loosing consciousness ?

_Dad ?_

The boys seem to notice his awakening as they began to stare at him in complete silence, their faces a combination of deep worry and anger. Again, he failed. He can barely move his arms and his sonar signals have ceased to function. He doesn’t understand how he can still see. Did one of them manage to access the petals in his chest and remove them ? Is that Rin moving in front of him ?

**_“Who is it Cap ?”_ **

**_“I-refuse…to say.”_ **

It’s a miracle the words manage to escape his broken body but he doesn’t have time to dwell on that as he detects Zimelu punching the wall next to him. He almost starts to scold his soldier, force of habit he supposes.

Some time passes -minutes, hours, days ?- as the five robots try again and again to pry information from him, to no avail. He refuses to throw you under the bus and have you feeling guilty the rest of your life. They threaten to tell all the other artists and he lets out a chuckle at their attempt if only followed by a long fit of coughs. It’s too late, even if they did, nothing could be done. However he still wishes they wouldn’t. It is the worst-case scenario, because now he will have to die surrounded by his most beloved creations shedding invisible tears for him. Why did things have to turn out like this ? Why couldn’t he have been more courageous in his life ?

**_“I’m sorry boys, guess your Captain wasn’t good enough.”_ **

**Warning: full system reboot failed, system will shut down in exactly ten hours, ten minutes and ten seconds**

_Ah isn’t that ironic…_

A few hours go by without any of the boys speaking anymore, they only surround him as he lays on the ground -they tried to move him to the bed but decided against it after hearing his distorted scream fills the room- wearing a mask of grim. Nothing to interrupt him anymore save for the occasional but violent fits of coughs tainting the wires in red.

**WARNING: INTRUDER ALERT**

**WARNING: INTRUDER ALERT**

**WARNING: TWO INTRUDERS DETECTED IN THE MAIN AREA**

What ? Now of all times ? Is someone looking to harm or kill him ? Or are they just some obsessive fans trying to approach his troops ? Well fate is on their side it seems, whoever they are. He only hopes they are not here to hurt them, in times of war, a dying man only serves as a burden at worst and a temporary shield at best.

**_“Zim, Haym and Eloni you go take care of it. Evaluate the threat level before taking action and keep me informed of your status. Purl and I will protect dad.”_ **

**_“Roger !”_ **

He never heard Rin speaks with so much authority in their voice before, their words carrying the orders of a true leader. Neon feels pride fills his heart at seeing his troops acting like a team, it’s good. It means they really don’t need him anymore. He managed to at least succeed in something. ~~He raised them well.~~ But Rin’s last word…it filled him with something else.

**_“Rin ?”_ **

**_“ As long as the flag of rhythm stands, we will keep on fighting.”_ **

_Ah…I get it now._

**_“UNHAND ME SIMPLETONS ! I NEED TO SEE NEON RIGHT NOW ! DON’T MAKE ME LOOSE MORE TIME THAN YOU HAVE ALREADY !”_ **

_What ?_

**_“What ?”_ **

That booming could only belong to-

**_“What is Subs doing here ?”_ **

Rin and Purl exchange a look bewilderment and slightly relax their posture. Neon does not even have time to think about the possible reasons for DJ breaking into into his home as the latter appears before him not even a minute later with something, or someone, carefully cradled in their arms followed by three confused robots trying to see what is hidden from their view. They however freeze on the spot as soon as they catch a glimpse of the cyborg lying on the ground surrounded by those cursed red flowers. After ten seconds of complete silence they let out the most exaggerated sigh Neon has ever heard in his life.

**_“I can not believe it. Stars I cannot believe it, you-“_ **

Someone coughs but this time it does not come from him. Rather it comes from whoever Supernova is carrying with them. Then a weak, barely audible speaks, equally confused of the current situation. Neon instantly recognizes it and thinks his system is about to give up on him.

**_“Nova ? Where did you take me ?”_ **

It’s you. You’re here He finally sees them. The lavender petals falling in a stream from your body tainted by the colour he came to loathe so much. You’re sick. You’re sick just like him and he only notices it now. How did you get cursed by this infernal disease ? Why you ?

**_“You refused to listen to me, a terrible mistake by the way, so I had to bring you here myself before it was too late.”_ **

**_“ Wha- ?”_ **

Your peaks from the cozy jacket and the state you’re in sends him in a spiral of misery. You look like the shadow of yourself, breathing with great difficulty, the eyes he dreamed so much about filled with dullness and acceptance. You had been ready to die, just like him. You spot him quickly and a small gasp leaves your lips.

**_“Sir ? No…no…what happened to you…“_ **

He really can’t tell who looks the most miserable between the two of you. And he wonders who would be foolish to not love you. Who would not want to hold you in their arms ? He would drown them himself if he could stand up. And-are you crying ? Why is Supernova is lying you down next to him ?

**_“Alright, it is time to end this farce before you two idiots die. Contrary to the both of you, I have better and more important things to do than watch you bleed out on the floor.”_ **

His orbs turns to face the androids who regrouped near his side.

**_“You five are leaving as well else this will take too much time to deal with. Either you follow me or I WILL make you.”_ **

They look at himself and you then at Supernova then back to you, then back to the DJ at least four times before they eventually decide to obey the order. Rin turns around at the last second and winks at him before disappearing from his radar. He is now alone with you and you are looking at him in a way he can not decipher.

**_“I tried you know…it was- it was simple curiosity at first, I’d heard a bit about you and wanted to hear one of your stories. I liked it so I came back for another one and…it started from there. I know it sounds stupid and corny as hell but I- really didn’t mean to…”_ **

_Huh ?_

**_“Huh ?”_ **

Like last time, you try to avoid looking at him but unlike last time your expression is more relaxed and carefree.

**_“And now I wonder when will you finally find peace ? You already had to suffer so much and now this ? Honestly, what will it take for you to finally be happy ?”_ **

**_“You.”_ **

_젠장_ _! This was terrible ! It was not supposed to happen like this !_

Your eyes are wide with shock at his confession -if one can even call it that- and after a few seconds he watches you clench the right side of your chest in complete amazement and when you breathes again, it’s free of blood, petals or wheezing. Then you look at him again, your gaze filled with adoration and warmth with a tired but elated smiled on your face he feels the vines around his lungs starting to fade and he after so much time suffocating in a sea of red, he can breath again. And in that moment, he believes he is the luckiest man alive for escaping death twice so he could have you by this side.

Finally, he can allow himself to caress your face with his gloved hand and when he does so tentatively, he feels your fingers close around his own, eyes closed in pure satisfaction. As if the simplest of touch from him was enough to bring you happiness. And he realizes you returning the gesture with the same amount of affection fills him so much joy he starts to sob, and he thinks he feels some tears leave your eyes as well. Neon only manages to compose himself after a few minutes before he can speak again.

**_“My dear, have I told about the time I narrowly avoided Death by being lucky enough to find the love of my life ?”_ **

Your laugh has more energy than any song he has produced since he joined NSR, he missed it. He promises to protect it with his life and for once it’s a promise he is sure to keep.

**_“I don’t think so sir, tell me what happened.”_ **

****

****

****

**_“Ugh that last line was terrible ! Way too corny !”_ **

**_“You idiots do take after him, fascinating.”_ **

**_“I’m gonna break that orb of yours you sorry excuse of a professor !”_ **

**_“ I am a DOCTOR !”_ **

**_“Hey, does that mean we have another parent now ?”_ **

**_"I guess ?"_ **

**_"Do we really sound so cheesy ?"_ **

**Author's Note:**

> Oh god I hope it's not too OOC, I just love making the characters I love suffer. I might turn this into a series for other characters, not sure yet.  
> Please tell me if there are grammatical errors, I am quite familiar with English but only have two functioning braincells and one is used to simp over fictional characters. Also I posted this at 7am after putting an all-nighter (kill me please). I also have absolutely no notion of Korean so I hope whatever little of it I wrote is at least correct. I have the headcanon that when under deep stress or generally upest, Neon will start to speak in his mother tongue (because I've seen a lot of people do it, myself included).  
> Korean translation:  
> 하…나는 내 마음을 잃고있어: Ha ... I'm losing my mind  
> 안 돼: no  
> 젠장 !: Damn it !
> 
> I accept constructive criticism.
> 
> PS: Neon's fate was supposed to be much worse at first. Basically, he finds out the reader is dating the space DJ and dies of grief in Eloni or Rin's arms. But I really didn't have the heart to do it because I'm too much of a pussy and also think he deserves a happy ending because of everything he went through and because I love him.


End file.
